Only in America....
can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. (THIS ONE ALWAYS BUGGED ME!)
do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
do we have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.
Wednesday, July 24, 2002
evildoer..... wrongdoer.... where does he get these words ?? you would think that a person who held 2 degrees from 2 of our county's best universities would have a much better vocabulary than he that. an undergraduate degree from yale and an mba from harvard and the best he can do is wrongdoer ?? is that even a word ??
well miram webster on line does list both of them as valid words... but surely between all of his educated assistants they could come up with a stronger word than wrongdoer.
wonder what the difference is between an evildoer and a wrongdoer? When does a wrongdoer become and evildoer ?? is a person just a wrongdoer if he uses his work position for personal gain while all those who work at the company and who have invested their life savings in the company that he has been hired to run end up with pennies. that's just wrong, not evil? is it wrong to sit in your multi-million dollar home and invoke the 5th amendment with a smirk on your face before congress while thousands of other people worry about their health coverage, and paying their bills now that the company they used to work for has been run into the ground and their retirement funds have all but disappeared ?? to knowingly decieve and carry on such schemes and fraud's over a period of years and gaining personally from your actions is pretty evil to me.
is it worse to to be a terrorist than it is to take a thriving company with tens of thousands of people dependant on the company for a pay check and tens of thousands of other people investing their future in the profits of the company and knowingly destroy the company, the livelihoods of the employees, and the investments that so many people have worked so hard to build..... and then say "i did nothing wrong."
well miram webster on line does list both of them as valid words... but surely between all of his educated assistants they could come up with a stronger word than wrongdoer.
wonder what the difference is between an evildoer and a wrongdoer? When does a wrongdoer become and evildoer ?? is a person just a wrongdoer if he uses his work position for personal gain while all those who work at the company and who have invested their life savings in the company that he has been hired to run end up with pennies. that's just wrong, not evil? is it wrong to sit in your multi-million dollar home and invoke the 5th amendment with a smirk on your face before congress while thousands of other people worry about their health coverage, and paying their bills now that the company they used to work for has been run into the ground and their retirement funds have all but disappeared ?? to knowingly decieve and carry on such schemes and fraud's over a period of years and gaining personally from your actions is pretty evil to me.
is it worse to to be a terrorist than it is to take a thriving company with tens of thousands of people dependant on the company for a pay check and tens of thousands of other people investing their future in the profits of the company and knowingly destroy the company, the livelihoods of the employees, and the investments that so many people have worked so hard to build..... and then say "i did nothing wrong."
Monday, July 15, 2002
In case you needed further proof that the human race is
doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label
instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sear's hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside.
(the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but it's "just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):
"Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time)?
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:
Do not drive a car or operate machinery after
taking this medication."
(And how many 5 year olds do we have driving?)
On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and...I'm taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what)?
On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a
bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts:
"Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume:
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for
this one, and perhaps the next one too.)
On A Baby Stroller:
"Remove child before folding."
(So, that's why it never folds up the way it was when
you took it out of the box.)
On a Swedish chainsaw:
"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or
genitals."
(Oh my ...was there a lot of this happening
somewhere?)
On a Can Of Cheese Whiz:
"For best results remove cap."
(You think? HELLO...)
..
doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label
instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sear's hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside.
(the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but it's "just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):
"Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time)?
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:
Do not drive a car or operate machinery after
taking this medication."
(And how many 5 year olds do we have driving?)
On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and...I'm taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what)?
On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a
bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts:
"Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume:
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for
this one, and perhaps the next one too.)
On A Baby Stroller:
"Remove child before folding."
(So, that's why it never folds up the way it was when
you took it out of the box.)
On a Swedish chainsaw:
"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or
genitals."
(Oh my ...was there a lot of this happening
somewhere?)
On a Can Of Cheese Whiz:
"For best results remove cap."
(You think? HELLO...)
..
Friday, July 12, 2002
last night i watched a dvd called "gosford park". its a movie directed by robert altman, who directed the original movie "mash" among others. It is a period movie set in the English countryside of 1932 at one of those monsterously large homes. he says his idea was to do an agatha christie-type murder mystery but spend the movie looking at it from the point of view of the servants. its an interesting movie. you can understand watching a movie like that what it took to make a place such as that run and how many servants were required... and visitors brought their own valets and maids who had to be fed and bed as well as the permanent staff. it is understandable why most of those places now are schools and hospitals and hotels and tourist attractions.
i haven't been to any stately english manor home of any lords and ladies, so i can't say if it is accurate. i have toured the 250-room biltmore house in north carolina which is probably about the closest thing we have in this country to a place like that. in the movie all of the formal "upstairs rooms" were actually filmed in a big old house, but all of the downstairs rooms are a movie set. the rooms really did remind me of what i saw in the servants quarters when i toured biltmore house. if you don't know what house i am talking about it is the mansion featured in movies like "richie rich" and "being there." when i toured the home all of the servants quarters were empty of people. it was interesting to see all of the hustle and bustle going on downstairs and how that contrasted with the slow formality of the upstairs rooms.
i guess it is what they call a comedy of manners. it is not a movie along the lines of "dude where's my car" it is something that i more snickered at and the funny lines but it takes a bit to settle into all of british accents. there are only two americans in the movie and one is ryan phillipe (doing a scottish accent) who sometimes is not that easy to understand without the accent. i'd watch him read the phone book so it really doesn't matter what he says, but this is a character driven movie and every character has a hidden secret. you can't always tell just by looking at them what it is.
its that way in life too. we call carry around secrets from each other.
i haven't been to any stately english manor home of any lords and ladies, so i can't say if it is accurate. i have toured the 250-room biltmore house in north carolina which is probably about the closest thing we have in this country to a place like that. in the movie all of the formal "upstairs rooms" were actually filmed in a big old house, but all of the downstairs rooms are a movie set. the rooms really did remind me of what i saw in the servants quarters when i toured biltmore house. if you don't know what house i am talking about it is the mansion featured in movies like "richie rich" and "being there." when i toured the home all of the servants quarters were empty of people. it was interesting to see all of the hustle and bustle going on downstairs and how that contrasted with the slow formality of the upstairs rooms.
i guess it is what they call a comedy of manners. it is not a movie along the lines of "dude where's my car" it is something that i more snickered at and the funny lines but it takes a bit to settle into all of british accents. there are only two americans in the movie and one is ryan phillipe (doing a scottish accent) who sometimes is not that easy to understand without the accent. i'd watch him read the phone book so it really doesn't matter what he says, but this is a character driven movie and every character has a hidden secret. you can't always tell just by looking at them what it is.
its that way in life too. we call carry around secrets from each other.
Thursday, July 11, 2002
my world and welcome to it. people said i should post more rants on my website. but i thought that it would be too hard to continually upload the whole thing each time i wanted to do it. then i happened to come across this stuff about blogs on the web. so i did a bit of research and decided to start my own. i'm going to do my best to update it a few times a week when some thing important gets me irked. so look back here frequently to see what i'm thinking about the world and my place in it. i've got a few things i need to get off my chest, so there may be a lot to read at first.
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