........Allowing the President to invade a neighboring nation whenever he shall deem it necessary to repel an invasion...and you allow him to make war at his pleasure. If today he should choose to say he thinks it necessary to invade Canada to prevent the British from invading us, how could you stop him ? You may say to him, "I see no probability of the British invading us," but he would say to you, "Be silent: I see it if you don't." -- Abraham Lincoln

NORTH POLE - In a press release this morning Santa Claus announced that, due to excessive government regulation, his annual December 24th voyages would be canceled until further notice.

Mr. Claus’s legal difficulties began on Christmas Eve of last year, when Santa’s sleigh was forced down by Air National Guard fighter jets after
violating military airspace. A subsequent Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) investigation resulted in Claus’s being forbidden from operating any
air transport within the United States of America. FAA documents show that infractions allegedly committed by Claus include repeated and flagrant
violation of airspeed, altitude, and routing rules, failure to file flight plans, habitual overloading of his sleigh, and delivering air cargo without
a commercial pilot’s license.

Claus’s excuse that these violations were necessary measures to enable him to deliver toys to all the world’s good children in one night was not
considered to be a mitigating factor. A further result of the investigation was the impounding of Santa’s sleigh by the National Transportation Safety
Board (NTSB) as unsafe; an NTSB spokesman summarized the agency’s case in the statement that "the glowing nose of a hoofed mammal is not an acceptable running light."

The information revealed in the FAA inquest prompted several other federal agencies to begin their own inquiries into Claus’s activities. The result of
these investigations was multiple indictments against Claus. The United States Customs Service, noting that Mr. Claus had not paid duties on the
toys he imported, requested that Claus be assessed millions of dollars in tariffs and fines. The Immigration and Naturalization Service, after being
informed that Claus had entered the United States and was working without a visa and Green Card, has begun deportation proceedings. Claus also faces fines and possible criminal charges in connection with a Department of Agriculture report accusing him of bringing nine reindeer into the United
States without appropriate vaccinations and quarantine procedures.

Additionally, special prosecutor Kenneth Starr is reported to be requesting his authority be extended to include investigating Claus, noting that Santa
has made yearly trips to Indonesia, Taiwan, and Little Rock. Starr has requested an additional $40 million for this investigation.

The investigations into Claus’s activities have also resulted in legal action being brought against Santa’s Workshop, a non-profit organization for
which Claus is chief executive officer. The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission has filed a class-action suit against Santa’s Workshop alleging
that that organization engages in discriminatory hiring practices by employing only elves; Santa’s Workshop has reportedly rejected a settlement
proposal of approximately $10 million in back pay, penalties, and diversity training for Santa and Mrs. Claus.

The Environmental Protection Agency has declared that Santa’s Workshop’s North Pole manufacturing facility is "severely contaminated" and filed suit
for cleanup expenses under the Superfund act; evidence cited includes reports of pointed ears and diminished stature among Santa’s Workshop
employees, and mutations such as flying and power of speech among the local reindeer population.

Furthermore, the Workshop’s financial records are being audited by the Internal Revenue Service (IRS) in an effort to determine how, in the words
of an IRS spokesman, "a supposedly charitable organization can give gifts to millions of children annually while receiving no apparent income."

In a related story the so-called Santagate hearings continued today in Congress. The House Committee on Un-Christmaslike Affairs heard testimony
from the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) stating that Santa’s distribution of presents is unconstitutional. "By discriminating between
naughty and nice children Santa Claus denies them equal protection under the law," an ACLU attorney stated. "By not informing children of their naughty or nice status and providing a means of appeal children are denied their right to due process. These actions are clearly in violation of the
Fourteenth Amendment."

In light of these hearings many of Claus’s former political allies have been quietly withdrawing their support of the beleaguered saint; former President
Jimmy Carter declaring that "I am not Santa Claus."
There are some reports that Santa Claus will not discontinue his benevolent activities entirely. A reliable source in Santa’s Workshop has stated that,
in the spirit of Christmas, Santa will be paying an unofficial trip to Washington, DC, this Christmas Eve. The same source speculated that this
trip may pertain to the distribution of a shipment of coal that Claus recently received.

National Day of Action November 21, 2002

http://www.walmartdayofaction.com/

Underneath Wal-Mart's "Good Neighbor" image is a company that....

Pages wages to low for most workers to afford basic living expenses, such as rent, mortgages, or health insurance.

Discriminates against workers who are women, people of color, and lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender.

Bullies employees by forcing them to work extra hours without overtime pay, firing them without just cause, refusing to pay medical bills for work-related injuries, denying them the right to organize, and creating and atmosphere of intimidation.

Violates human rights and anti-discrimination laws.

Regularly does business with foreign countries and suppliers that commit human rights abuses.

Destroys the fabric of communities by displacing family-owned businesses, dispersing their customers and eliminating jobs (for every two jobs created, the community loses three).

Shows contempt for the law by hiding or filing to produce records, doctoring records, and presenting false records.

Worsens sprawl, which destroys the beauty of the environment and aggravates pollution.

Barges into communities that do not want them my manipulating municipal officals and legal systems.

Join the People's Campaign - Justice @ Wal Mart to make Wal-Mart respect the values, respond to the needs and hear the voices of the people - the workers, consumers, suppliers, and communities - who have made Wal_Mart the largest retailer and the largest corporation in America.

Together our coalition will transform Wal-Mart into a responsible corporate citizen that provides good jobs, equal opportunity, fair business and trade practices, neighborhood-friendly operations and respect for the rights of workers, consumers, and communities.

1. Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when people make love they produce amounts of the hormones which make hair shiny and skin smooth.

2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis, makes your skin glow.

3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on during that romantic dinner.

4. Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and tones up just about every muscle in the body. It's more enjoyable than swimming 20 laps, and you don't need special sneakers!

5. Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases the chemical endorphin into the bloodstream, producing a sense of euphoria and leaving you with a feeling of well-being.

6. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones. These subtle sex perfumes drive people crazy!

7. Sex is the safest tranquilizer in the world. IT IS 10 TIMES MORE EFFECTIVE THAN VALIUM.

8. Kissing each day will keep the dentist away. Kissing encourages saliva to wash food from the teeth and lowers the level of the acid that causes decay, preventing plaque buildup.

9. Sex actually relieves headaches. A lovemaking session can release the tension that restricts blood vessels in the brain.

10. A lot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a natural antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever.

OK.. ive seen all those inkblot tests in the movies and on tv.. but i've never taken one until now.. here's the online link u can take it urself to see what it says....

there are 11 wild color inblots.. about 50 questions so be warned it's a little long. here is what it said about me...

justin, your unconscious mind is driven most by Curiosity

This means you are full of questions about life, people, and the potential of your future. You spend more time than others envisioning the possibilities of your life — things that others are too afraid to consider.

Your curiosity burns with an almost physical need to know and do more. It's only through new experiences that you feel a greater understanding of yourself or the world — which ultimately is the greatest way for you to feel satisfied.

It is possible that the underlying reason for your drive towards curiosity is a deeply rooted fear of boredom. That means that you are probably more susceptible than others to feel like you're falling into a rut when life slows down into a comfortable routine.

You need to make sure you have stimulation in your life — that makes you feel like you're innovating or being exposed to the ideas and experiences that truly inspire you.

With such a strong orientation towards curiosity, you're also prone to a rebellious quality that shows up when you feel you are just going through the motions, and are unable to really influence the world around you. But interestingly enough, your drive towards novel experiences also indicates an openness others don't have, but wish they did.

Unconsciously, your curiosity presses you to learn more, experience more, and get the most out of life.

Though your unconscious mind is driven most strongly by Curiosity, there is much more to who you are at your core.

Last Friday, the Oprah show covered a story of a Nigerian woman, Amina Lawal, who has been sentenced to death by stoning because she had a baby out of wedlock. She has tried to appeal the decision but has been unsuccessful thus far. The head of Nigeria disagrees with these stonings but has yet to do anything--partly because of the fear of not being re-elected. I should also note that the father of the baby denied fathering the child and, hence, has escaped any form of punishment.
Amina Lawal's stoning will occur as soon as she is finished nursing her child. She will be buried up to her neck in dirt and townsmen will throw stones at her head until they kill her--which has been known to take hours.


I send out a plea to all the women receiving this e-mail and to all the men raised by women to join me and many others to help prevent this horrific and inhumane event from occurring. All you have to do is visit the Oprah website: www.oprah.com and click on the Amina Lawal pop up screen or search using Amina's name and you will see a pre-written letter addressed to the Nigerian Ambassador.


Just fill out your information on the bottom of the page and send it. It's as simple as that. You can even go one step further and forward this e-mail to your friends so they can be part of the mission to save Amina Lawal. It's your chance to save one woman's life. We can claim ignorance when doing nothing to stop vicious atrocities that we know nothing about from occurring but there is no justification if we standby and allow these events to take place when we are fully aware of them.


Thank you very much for reading this...now the ball is in your court.

Dear Dr. Laura,

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's law. I have learned a great deal from you, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. How should I deal with this?

I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as it suggests in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev. 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

Lev. 25:44 states that I may buy slaves from the nations that are around us. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans but not Canadians. Can you clarify?

I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Lev. 10:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

Lev. 20:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

A Fan

It's always been my dream to see Paris, France. Don't you think just once in your life you ought to visit a country where they don't speak English -- and don't even want to. -Mrs. Webb from Thornton Wilder's Our Town

Only 6% of U.S. citizens hold valid passports. That means that very few Americans have ventured out of our country farther than Canada, Mexico, or a few Carbbiean island where a U.S. birth certificate is suffient for travel.

Then after the events of 9/11/01 people in this country became shocked that folks in other countries just don't like us. But it looks like we've never taken the time and effort to get to know them.

I have been out of the U.S. several times and have chat friends online from various countries around the world (Canada, Brazil, Austraila, the Phillipenes, South Africa, Italy, Austria, the Czech Republic, Germany, Spain, Belgium, the UK). It is interesting to discuss things with people from other places and find out about them and what interests them. While most of them are very interested in the U.S.

They get U.S. movies, tv shows and music in almost every one of those countries, yet the same is not true about U.S. Everyone seems to know about the breakup of Brittany and Justin but we don't get music by major musical acts from Brazil (a country the same size and with more people that the US), or TV shows from Australia or the UK (which are already in English). And if a foreign movie or tv shows well elsewhere, before they show it in the U.S. we have to make our own version of it.

We export McDonalds, and KFC, and TGI Friday's around the world, but try and find a bottle of HP Sauce or vegamite at the Winn Dixie or Super Wal-Mart. And that is truly strange since the one thing we seem interested in of other countries is their food -- Shall we go out for Thai or Mexican tonight dear ? And let me tell you from personal experience, chinese food in china is nothing like your neighborhood take out place.

Our country is very blind to the heritage and cultures of other countries, which is strange considering that we are a nation of immigrants ourselves. Nobody here is really from here. Even the native Americans arrived by land bridge from Asia and boats from the pacific islands.

Our citizen's are also blind to the perceptions people in other countries have about us.

Our citizen's are also blind to many of the actions of our government overseas and our government's interaction with other countries. In the last two years, especially, our country is more and more seen as a country that does not work and play well with others.

Until 09/11/02 government officials have shunned involement and cooperation with other countries. Either breaking many of our established treaties (The ABM and nuculear non-proliferation treaties) or "just saying 'no'to agreements seeen as necessary and prudent by our friends and enemies across the globe (the global warming treaty, the war crimes court). Under dubya's father and his hero Ronald Reagan we didn't even pay our UN dues.

Although I believe dubya is willing to have our country enter a war in Iraq without the blessing of the community of nations, he understands that the citizens (voters) are not willing for the US to make such a brutish move.

We are the only remaining Superpower in the world and a huge force for any one country or group of countries to deal with. The provides us wiht an opportunity unique in the history of the world. We have a the opportunity to build consensus and motivate actions to do good around the world. To assist countries less developed than ourselves erase hunger and disease, to jointly explore parts of our world and other worlds yet to be investigated. To lead by example of what democracy and entrupeneurship can really do.

Instead we are acting like the bully on the school playground. Do what I want you to do or we will beat you up. Play my way, by my rules, or else.