Friday, April 06, 2007
| With a rigid ruler handy, get a full erection. Lay the ruler along the top of your penis (that is, the side that faces upward when you're standing with your penis sticking straight out), and press the end of the ruler firmly against your body (where the pubic hair is). Hold your penis against the ruler with your hand, straighten out as much as possible any curvature that may exist, and try to hold your penis so that it's sticking straight out from your body. Then, looking straight down, determine the ruler reading at the very end of your penis. | |
Which of the following ranges reflects your erect penis length, as measured by the above method?
| |
| Approximate average (based on ranges): 6.13" Approximate average of those age 16 and over: 6.20" | |
Approximate average erect penis length (age 16 and above) vs. preferred underwear type:
Interesting — guys who wear briefs have shorter penises than guys who wear looser styles, or nothing. But it's impossible to determine cause and effect: Does the underwear syle affect penis size, or does penis size affect a person's choice of underwear? More studies are needed! | |
How would you describe the typical size of your flaccid (non-erect) penis relative to your erect size?
| |
Which of the following do you like least about your penis — that is, what would you change, if you could?
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Average approximate penis size based on ethnicity (age 16 and over):
| |
| We've all heard the politically correct claim that penis size doesn't vary by ethnicity, but these findings show a clear correlation, at least among certain groups. African-based ethnicities have the largest average penises by far, and Asians have the smallest, with over an inch separating the two — quite a lot for considering that these are broad averages. Of course, there are many, many exceptions in all groups. | |
How would you describe the color of the hair on your head? (If it has grayed or fallen out, answer based on the hair you had when you were younger.)
| |
| Guys with blond hair, on average, have the largest penises. As hair color darkens, average penis size goes down; those with black hair have the smallest average penises. Guys with red hair (whom some believe have the largest penises) are actually below average in size, coming in second to last in this breakdown. Understand, though, that this is only an average correlation; many blond-haired guys reported having small penises, and many dark-haired guys reported having large ones. | |
| What is your shoe size? (Unfortunately we neglected to consider that non-U.S. countries use different shoe-size units; therefore, for this question only people from the U.S. were considered.) Average shoe size: 10.8
| |
| Interestingly, there does appear to be a direct correlation between average adult shoe size and average adult penis size, which seems to debunk the claim that there is no such correlation — although again, this is based on averages of many JackinWorld readers. | |
If someone gave you a bottle of pills advertised to enlarge your penis, and you took them for the recommended time period, what do you think would happen?
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Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Liar Liar Pants on Fire!!!
Recently released Justice Department documents show Attorney General Alberto Gonzales indicates he lied about his involvement in recent dismissals of 8 U.S. Attorneys. Two weeks ago Gonzales said, "I was not involved in seeing any memos, was not involved in any discussion about what was going on."
However the documents reveal that on November 27th, Gonzales met with 5 other officals from the Justice Department and signed off on a plan to fire the prosecutors.
Sunday, February 11, 2007
same sex attraction disorder
From the 2/6/07 episode of BOSTON LEGAL:
Has anyone ever heard of restless leg syndrome? It's where you move
your leg around in your sleep. It's awful. You may have it. May not
keep you awake; may not harm you in any way; may not bother you in
the slightest. But it's awful. The pharmaceutical companies have
declared it so, so they've invented a drug and you simply must take
it.
If you haven't heard of restless leg syndrome, then you probably
have attention deficit disorder. Awful … there's a lot of drugs for
that one. You must take them.
You're depressed …
You're not sleeping enough …
You think you're shy, but you've actually got a social anxiety
disorder.
Weak stream …
Irritable bowel syndrome …
You people have all kinds of ailments that you don't know about.
Luckily we've got drugs for every one of them. You must take them.
(At this point the judge interrupts and asks what the lawyer is
talking about. The following is his reply.)
Same sex attraction disorder. And what troubles me is why the folks
in big pharmaceutical companies haven't invented a pill for this
disease. Clearly they're in the business of selling sickness. If
there was a profit to be made, they would make it. And with an
estimated gay population of over 10 million people just in the US
alone, there certainly is a big enough market. Could it be that they can't cure it?
Well, not to worry. If big pharmaceutical can't do it, maybe big
religion can. And they are. They are the ones who have coined the
term 'same sex attraction disorder.' It's a very good name. And a
good name is very important. It's the crucial first step in
disqualifying homosexuals as a segment of the population and
categorizing them as a disease. It makes homosexuals seem less like
people and more like … the flu. And with terrible, awful symptoms.
But curable. And therefore, less concerning when it comes to things
like an individual's rights, freedom, privacy, marriage.
Big religion is very concerned with marriage. Big religion is the
one filling the pockets of Congress and actually got them to propose
a Constitutional ban on gay marriage. Think about that. A
governmentally imposed, systematic prejudice against a class based
on their sexual orientation. Nevermind that one of the most trusted
evangelical advisors to the president was himself having a
homosexual affair on the side. Nevermind that one of our Congressman
was writing naughty emails to his teenage male pages. Isn't it just
a disease? And I just thought that it was curable. That's what they
told me down at the church.
Well, you can legislate against it, you can give it a clever name
and treat people for it, you can shut your eyes and have sex with
your wife and pretend it all feels right. You can join the church
and swear to be celibate for the rest of your life; you can drive
around on a Saturday night with a baseball bat and try to beat it
out of some poor soul you happen to meet. You can even come to this
courtroom and testify about your "new leaf" and how well it's all
working. What a miracle. My only response is … give it time, we'll
see.
Meanwhile, this company took $40,000 from my client promising to
cure him of his gayness. Only in America, only in a country that overtly and notoriously celebrates its prejudice against a class of people by proposing constitutional amendments. God bless us all. Home of the brave.
Has anyone ever heard of restless leg syndrome? It's where you move
your leg around in your sleep. It's awful. You may have it. May not
keep you awake; may not harm you in any way; may not bother you in
the slightest. But it's awful. The pharmaceutical companies have
declared it so, so they've invented a drug and you simply must take
it.
If you haven't heard of restless leg syndrome, then you probably
have attention deficit disorder. Awful … there's a lot of drugs for
that one. You must take them.
You're depressed …
You're not sleeping enough …
You think you're shy, but you've actually got a social anxiety
disorder.
Weak stream …
Irritable bowel syndrome …
You people have all kinds of ailments that you don't know about.
Luckily we've got drugs for every one of them. You must take them.
(At this point the judge interrupts and asks what the lawyer is
talking about. The following is his reply.)
Same sex attraction disorder. And what troubles me is why the folks
in big pharmaceutical companies haven't invented a pill for this
disease. Clearly they're in the business of selling sickness. If
there was a profit to be made, they would make it. And with an
estimated gay population of over 10 million people just in the US
alone, there certainly is a big enough market. Could it be that they can't cure it?
Well, not to worry. If big pharmaceutical can't do it, maybe big
religion can. And they are. They are the ones who have coined the
term 'same sex attraction disorder.' It's a very good name. And a
good name is very important. It's the crucial first step in
disqualifying homosexuals as a segment of the population and
categorizing them as a disease. It makes homosexuals seem less like
people and more like … the flu. And with terrible, awful symptoms.
But curable. And therefore, less concerning when it comes to things
like an individual's rights, freedom, privacy, marriage.
Big religion is very concerned with marriage. Big religion is the
one filling the pockets of Congress and actually got them to propose
a Constitutional ban on gay marriage. Think about that. A
governmentally imposed, systematic prejudice against a class based
on their sexual orientation. Nevermind that one of the most trusted
evangelical advisors to the president was himself having a
homosexual affair on the side. Nevermind that one of our Congressman
was writing naughty emails to his teenage male pages. Isn't it just
a disease? And I just thought that it was curable. That's what they
told me down at the church.
Well, you can legislate against it, you can give it a clever name
and treat people for it, you can shut your eyes and have sex with
your wife and pretend it all feels right. You can join the church
and swear to be celibate for the rest of your life; you can drive
around on a Saturday night with a baseball bat and try to beat it
out of some poor soul you happen to meet. You can even come to this
courtroom and testify about your "new leaf" and how well it's all
working. What a miracle. My only response is … give it time, we'll
see.
Meanwhile, this company took $40,000 from my client promising to
cure him of his gayness. Only in America, only in a country that overtly and notoriously celebrates its prejudice against a class of people by proposing constitutional amendments. God bless us all. Home of the brave.
Monday, July 31, 2006
Condisleeza Rice: " A hasty cease-fire would not be a good thing"W: "Not a FAKE PEACE"
600 people have died in Southern Lebonon because three Isreali soldiers were killed and two were captured. It's against all morality and it's real W. Anything that stops the senseless killing is good. We can work out the long term details after we stop the killing. Do it the Bill W. way... "I will not kill, just for today."
I don't see why a hasty cease-fire wouldn't be a good thing if it would keep people from dying, Condi ? Maybe your new Prada shoes are too tight and you can't think clearly.
I don't see why a hasty cease-fire wouldn't be a good thing if it would keep people from dying, Condi ? Maybe your new Prada shoes are too tight and you can't think clearly.
Thursday, July 13, 2006
I OWE MY MOTHER
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC
" Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you"
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC
" Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you"
Monday, February 20, 2006
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